“Women make the homes and we are the homes, the bodies that house other bodies, the portal of souls.” Fantastic, as always. The complexity you pull out of sexuality and what may seem to those outside it to be a straightforward or two dimensional culture is excellent. Thanks for sharing.
Love the way you tell your story and the candor and insightful observations in it.
"Women want to feel sexy. They want a fuckin’ stage. They want admiration.
And they want it on their terms—
Without being assaulted or thrown in the trash."
A stage and admiration - and not just for their sexuality. But also for their other powers and skills. Without being mansplained, not taken seriously, or outcast because there are so few (wo)men who are confident enough to be comfortable with a woman who's more intelligent, capable, or successful than they are.
I love it. I danced traditionally for 20 years, and I still use my sexuality. It is a form of power, though, I’m not trying to control anyone, but feeling the power of my own sensuality is intoxicating for me, and I love the conversation that enables us to admit that instead of pretending we are shocked to discover we are sexy and desirable. Give me a break. Own it, you know? Thanks for sharing. 💛👏
In the last few years I've come hard out of Christian trad-wife life and I came here to say this is GOLD. Your insights, your imagery, the whole package. Excuse me while I shed more religion and go dance for myself!
It’s a great bar. Although it doesn’t look like the movie. And it had like one bouncer since no one wanted a lifetime ban. Also it was very expensive to get really drunk.
Whew finally an honest statement. In the all pervasive social game known as feminism, women have no sexual desire, all sexual desire, all sexual aggression or blamed on men. You would think that women were some kind of a prop or mannequin, which is essentially one twisted version of the modern account of human sexuality. of course this is so counterintuitive that it is plainly false.
However, it supports the patriarchy narrative and also the narrative that since women never wants sex, all sex rape. But what you are saying is absolutely true. I know this much personal experience as a photographer who took photographs of women in mirrors in five different countries over about 12 years. Women not only want to be seen they want to be seen acknowledging themselves and they want to be appreciated and understood and I would also say exalted and revered.
And we might ask what the problem with admitting and acknowledging all of this is. And my sense is that it immediately subverts the notion that female is a construction, and that there is no actual female desire, that all sexual desire is an intrusion on women, And that therefore women are inherently pure.
Acknowledge this would change the entire power dynamic of the highly politicized conversation about sexuality and sexism.
I could go on and on, but I want to tell you that from my experience as someone who has known many many women, many sex, workers, many models, etc., etc., etc. that what you were saying is extremely perceptive and straightforward.
Former stripper here… Wow. Incredible piece. I haven’t danced in 10 years or so and for some reason, I’ve been missing it. I live a much quieter and healthier life now but damn, those years of my early 20s I’ve romanticized and put on a special little shelf in my head. You put words to my feelings. Thank you for sharing this.
“Women make the homes and we are the homes, the bodies that house other bodies, the portal of souls.” Fantastic, as always. The complexity you pull out of sexuality and what may seem to those outside it to be a straightforward or two dimensional culture is excellent. Thanks for sharing.
Thank you for your attention. 🙏
I came here with the same line to quote!
Nice! It’s a killer one!
This was an excellent line.
Spectacular and profound line.
And thank you Lindsay in particular!
Too tired…..I dance while I cook. I feel sexy, my family asks if I am having a seizure🤣
Haters, lol! Keep dancing!
Love the way you tell your story and the candor and insightful observations in it.
"Women want to feel sexy. They want a fuckin’ stage. They want admiration.
And they want it on their terms—
Without being assaulted or thrown in the trash."
A stage and admiration - and not just for their sexuality. But also for their other powers and skills. Without being mansplained, not taken seriously, or outcast because there are so few (wo)men who are confident enough to be comfortable with a woman who's more intelligent, capable, or successful than they are.
This, 💯
I love it. I danced traditionally for 20 years, and I still use my sexuality. It is a form of power, though, I’m not trying to control anyone, but feeling the power of my own sensuality is intoxicating for me, and I love the conversation that enables us to admit that instead of pretending we are shocked to discover we are sexy and desirable. Give me a break. Own it, you know? Thanks for sharing. 💛👏
Great grandma and her sister were madames. I call them “our whorefathers” 🤣
Whorefathers! I’m gonna have to borrow that term!
Oh I love that….❤️
In the last few years I've come hard out of Christian trad-wife life and I came here to say this is GOLD. Your insights, your imagery, the whole package. Excuse me while I shed more religion and go dance for myself!
Thank you! I’m honored to hear you say that.
No reason you should shed your religion hon….they all still love sex and sexuality
I do “Dance sexy” in the mirror. However, as a middle aged white guy with a dad bod, it comes off as more “silly and endearing “ than “sexy”
Still… my wife likes it…. Makes her laugh on the bad days.
Respect!
That A.I. thumbnail is nightmare fuel
I still remember viscerally how much I wanted to be a coyote when I was a teenager. The 2000s movie might be dated now, but the urge still resonates.
I love your voice (and AI prompt results). Thank you for sharing.
One of my friends actually lived that dream.... and gave a lot of body shots! 😂 Thank you for reading!
It’s a great bar. Although it doesn’t look like the movie. And it had like one bouncer since no one wanted a lifetime ban. Also it was very expensive to get really drunk.
I take the dare. Yes, sometimes I do fucking dance in the mirror. And I love doing it for my own pleasure and enjoyment. 😉
Respect!
Whew finally an honest statement. In the all pervasive social game known as feminism, women have no sexual desire, all sexual desire, all sexual aggression or blamed on men. You would think that women were some kind of a prop or mannequin, which is essentially one twisted version of the modern account of human sexuality. of course this is so counterintuitive that it is plainly false.
However, it supports the patriarchy narrative and also the narrative that since women never wants sex, all sex rape. But what you are saying is absolutely true. I know this much personal experience as a photographer who took photographs of women in mirrors in five different countries over about 12 years. Women not only want to be seen they want to be seen acknowledging themselves and they want to be appreciated and understood and I would also say exalted and revered.
And we might ask what the problem with admitting and acknowledging all of this is. And my sense is that it immediately subverts the notion that female is a construction, and that there is no actual female desire, that all sexual desire is an intrusion on women, And that therefore women are inherently pure.
Acknowledge this would change the entire power dynamic of the highly politicized conversation about sexuality and sexism.
I could go on and on, but I want to tell you that from my experience as someone who has known many many women, many sex, workers, many models, etc., etc., etc. that what you were saying is extremely perceptive and straightforward.
Thank you for your thoughtful read of my piece. I appreciate your attention.
“Women want to feel sexy. They want a fuckin’ stage. They want admiration.
And they want it on their terms—
Without being assaulted or thrown in the trash.”
👏👏👏👏👏👏
Since nobody else is gonna say it: fuck yeah I dance sexy in the mirror!
Hell yeah!!
Former stripper here… Wow. Incredible piece. I haven’t danced in 10 years or so and for some reason, I’ve been missing it. I live a much quieter and healthier life now but damn, those years of my early 20s I’ve romanticized and put on a special little shelf in my head. You put words to my feelings. Thank you for sharing this.
Thank you for reading. 💕
I thought about this but never really sat and THOUGHT about it. Had a present dad but not present at the same time, SA trauma & all that..
But after figuring out the hyper sexuality that came with the trauma/clearing that fog …
I still want to be sexy and it’s a superpower now more than ever. Shit pumps me up before I leave the house.
Very good essay. The writer elicits the grim tawdriness of stripping while also clearly explaining the primal motivations involved.